All posts in Relationships

Staying out of the Drama Triangle

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Last Thursday I spoke at the Cleveland County Chamber of Commerce.  Many of the participants told me that one of their major take-aways was an understanding of how not to enter the The Drama Triangle.  I think it works with people, the way the Bermuda Triangle works with planes.  We’ve heard of planes entering the Bermuda Triangle then never being heard from again.  I’ve seen the same with the Drama Triangle.  Sometimes when people enter into it, they can never get out.  Here are 2 quick ideas of how to keep yourself “drama-free”.

1.  Increase your level of Awareness

The drama triangle can be very subtle.  It’s key to have relationships that will speak into your life when they see you entering into the “drama zone”.  Who do you have to give you the feedback you need for high performance?  When was the last time you asked for feedback?

2.  Increase your level of Responsibility

Only when you realize that you are 100% responsibility for your life, will you begin to grow and change.  As long as you operate in the role of blamer, victim or persecutor you never make a difference.  Once of the best definitions I’ve heard of responsibility is the ability to be response-able.  When you’re responsible, you’re able to respond positively to anything life throws at you.  Don’t be reactive but increase your ability to respond.  What area of your life (spiritual, financial, health, relationships or career) do you need to increase your ability to respond?  Who can help hold you accountable to increase your responsibility?

The difference between winners and losers is that winners do habitually what losers do only occasionally.  Stay out of the drama and make a difference!

 

New Questions

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I spent last week in Boston with a bunch of international change agents from Living Word Missions!  We’ve been a part of this family for the last 17 years and every time I get around them I am challenged to give and do more!

Your life is directed by the questions that you ask yourself.  When I was there this week I spent time to reflect on my life, and ask myself some new questions.  Here are some things that I am asking myself this week:

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Tips for Communicators

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We are all communicators!  This is how we get things done with other people and your success depends on your ability to get your message through the clutter.  The better you become with your communication, the better your results!

I just finished The Power to Connect.  It’s a great resource for anyone that exchanges ideas and information in order to influence people’s actions (which is every leader I know!).  Here are six key questions to ask yourself before you share your story:

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Elevate Your Influence Through Trust

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Trust is never static.  Everything you do impacts others’ level of trust in you because there is a difference between being trustworthy and being trusted.  How you behave as a leader is always under the microscope, so be very conscious of whether you are building or diminishing trust.

Have you ever mistakenly mistrusted someone who was in fact trustworthy?  A common misconception is that honesty alone breeds trust.  Bridging the trust gap is a marriage of character and skill.  Four elements must be present for trust to increase:

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